Glorious Beautiful Mystery
Friday, June 18, 2010
Cambodia Update, 3 weeks in
Hello!
It's been a full two weeks since my last update, and so much has happened. Once again, I only have a short minute to put some things down for you, so we'll see what you get : )
We just finished our English classes yesterday, and a sad day it was. Even though, teaching English as a second language is completely new to me and rather hard at times, I came to care about, and genuinely love my students. Therefore, (this week especially) any stress that I might have felt the first two weeks fell away, and I was able to thoroughly enjoy the classtime I had with my kids. I realized at some point that I was trying rather hard to reframe from really loving my students because that would mean getting attached to them, and making it harder for me to leave. But God really had his way with me, and I let go of all reserve and my heart went wild with love and compassion for the kids in my classes. There's so much I wish I could give them. I'm glad, at least, that I was permitted these three weeks and a place of such position in their lives, being their English teacher. I could really tell, especially in contrast with the teachers their used to - who tend to discipline harshly and shamefully -, that these kids could feel the difference in me. I laughed with them, celebrated with them, and cared about them. My older students, specifically, I had a real connection with. On Thursday, I told them that I have really enjoyed being their teacher and that I would miss them alot. ....and actually, on the Tuesday before, I even felt the need to make an English lesson out of Jesus loving them. I translated from English that Jesus can help when we have pain because he loves us like no one else. This was such a big deal for me, because for the first time, I think in my entire life, I felt such a conviction that I was really sharing "the gospel" with teenagers that really might receive it well in that moment. Jesus really is someone totally other than here. The way Jesus lives and teaches us to live is NOT the norm here, at all. For someone to love without any kind of abuse in the relationship, is really uncommon, from what I've seen. Physical discipline, and the trafficking of your own children is what's common here. People see it as normal and a way to earn money alone. (and that's the very uncomplicated version of it)
Anyways, I need to move on, I can talk more about that on a one on one basis if people want to. Yesterday, on my last day, it turns out my students were sad to see me go as well. One by one, I received different gifts to remember them by. A bracelet, paper stars in vibrant colors, origami hearts, and a beautifully wrapped box with a red bow that had necklace inside and a note that said "Please have a good trip back home."
I only say all of that to show God's work these past weeks, because the student who gave me the wrapped box, was also the student who seemed the most stand-offish, and most unreceptive to being loved through the whole three weeks. When I told the class about Jesus, he shook his head like "whatever." And when I told the class I would miss them, he made a joke about it. (Though, I told the translator to tell him "He doesn't have to miss me. That's ok. I'll just miss him.") So, when he gave me that box yesterday, it was a really big deal for me. I had been praying that I could have some kind of closure yesterday, that it was a good last day with my students, that I would feel really good about trusting God with them after leaving. And he, of course, was one that I was scared for. I've seen the crowd he hangs our with and the way he reacts to the church. That gift said a thousand words for me. I feel so blessed by God, that I was able to be apart of
anything that might have happened in this boy's heart.
So, yeah. This last week that I'm here, we're going to debrief some, visit Siem Reap, and be honored with a trip to visit a girls aftercare center. I'm so excited for all that God has done here, in me, in my team, and in Svay Pak. Thank you all so much for being a part of it with me, and supporting me through it.
I must go now, I love you all,
Jenee
It's been a full two weeks since my last update, and so much has happened. Once again, I only have a short minute to put some things down for you, so we'll see what you get : )
We just finished our English classes yesterday, and a sad day it was. Even though, teaching English as a second language is completely new to me and rather hard at times, I came to care about, and genuinely love my students. Therefore, (this week especially) any stress that I might have felt the first two weeks fell away, and I was able to thoroughly enjoy the classtime I had with my kids. I realized at some point that I was trying rather hard to reframe from really loving my students because that would mean getting attached to them, and making it harder for me to leave. But God really had his way with me, and I let go of all reserve and my heart went wild with love and compassion for the kids in my classes. There's so much I wish I could give them. I'm glad, at least, that I was permitted these three weeks and a place of such position in their lives, being their English teacher. I could really tell, especially in contrast with the teachers their used to - who tend to discipline harshly and shamefully -, that these kids could feel the difference in me. I laughed with them, celebrated with them, and cared about them. My older students, specifically, I had a real connection with. On Thursday, I told them that I have really enjoyed being their teacher and that I would miss them alot. ....and actually, on the Tuesday before, I even felt the need to make an English lesson out of Jesus loving them. I translated from English that Jesus can help when we have pain because he loves us like no one else. This was such a big deal for me, because for the first time, I think in my entire life, I felt such a conviction that I was really sharing "the gospel" with teenagers that really might receive it well in that moment. Jesus really is someone totally other than here. The way Jesus lives and teaches us to live is NOT the norm here, at all. For someone to love without any kind of abuse in the relationship, is really uncommon, from what I've seen. Physical discipline, and the trafficking of your own children is what's common here. People see it as normal and a way to earn money alone. (and that's the very uncomplicated version of it)
Anyways, I need to move on, I can talk more about that on a one on one basis if people want to. Yesterday, on my last day, it turns out my students were sad to see me go as well. One by one, I received different gifts to remember them by. A bracelet, paper stars in vibrant colors, origami hearts, and a beautifully wrapped box with a red bow that had necklace inside and a note that said "Please have a good trip back home."
I only say all of that to show God's work these past weeks, because the student who gave me the wrapped box, was also the student who seemed the most stand-offish, and most unreceptive to being loved through the whole three weeks. When I told the class about Jesus, he shook his head like "whatever." And when I told the class I would miss them, he made a joke about it. (Though, I told the translator to tell him "He doesn't have to miss me. That's ok. I'll just miss him.") So, when he gave me that box yesterday, it was a really big deal for me. I had been praying that I could have some kind of closure yesterday, that it was a good last day with my students, that I would feel really good about trusting God with them after leaving. And he, of course, was one that I was scared for. I've seen the crowd he hangs our with and the way he reacts to the church. That gift said a thousand words for me. I feel so blessed by God, that I was able to be apart of
anything that might have happened in this boy's heart.
So, yeah. This last week that I'm here, we're going to debrief some, visit Siem Reap, and be honored with a trip to visit a girls aftercare center. I'm so excited for all that God has done here, in me, in my team, and in Svay Pak. Thank you all so much for being a part of it with me, and supporting me through it.
I must go now, I love you all,
Jenee
posted by Jenee at 8:29 PM
1 Comments:
that's so awesome!!! i love it! you need to come over and spend the night once or twice when you get home, so i can hear more stories!! love you girl, praying for you lots. have a fun trip home!!
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